Sunday, February 21, 2010
Economic Down Turn
The economy has now definately hit us with its full force, at least I hope this is its full force. Our checking account has definately felt it over the past year with Mike going through 3 different pay-cuts and now it has only gotten worse. Our majority income has officially stopped for the time being. Its frustrating on so many different levels I can't even begin to exlpain it. For 5 years Mike has had this job where he was working out of town ALL the time. We had money but NO time together. We never had time together to go spend the money, now we have all the time in the world together and no money to go do things. If thats not ironic I don't know what is! There are so many different things we want to do and neither one of us know where to start or how we are going to start. I'm reluctantly writing about all this right now because I really hate to talk to other people about this kind of thing. There is so much going on in our heads and I hate to try to talk to someone only to hear negativity. There aren't alot of people that think about life the way Mike and I do. Rather than try to explain to everyone our perspective on life and our future I have learned to just sit back and keep my mouth shut. Everytime I have tried to give my perspective on life and money and the way I want my future to be, I only hear other peoples negativity and listen to them tear apart my thoughts and ideas. I know that I need to put my faith in God and give him all of my worries. He will take care of us. He always has. We have gotten into a financial bind before and somehow we always had enough money to pay bills and put food on the table so I know he will take care of us. I know that God has given us all these hopes, dreams, and ideas for a reason and that he has a path for us; I'm just not positive we are on the right path yet. I feel like I'm waiting for something, something to happen, something to find me, something that I need to find; I don't know really I just feel like I'm waiting for something. Something is missing. I haven't been sleeping, I have just been listing things on my new eBid.net (JustBuyIt) store like crazy hoping that I will start having one sale right after the other. Its funny how sometimes that happens, I won't sell anything for a month or two and then all of the sudden I'll have a bunch of sales right at once. I'm hoping that happens soon... I need that to happen soon. Mike has also been working with his Dad as sort of a partner in his Dad's construction company. Every job that Mike gets his Dad pays him a percentage. He has been out trying to sell roofs, remodel jobs, new consturction homes, etc like crazy; it just isn't fast enough. He needs to have selling spurt too just like I do. I have my little businesses and now all of the sudden I don't feel like I can work on them enough, fast enough or enough time to work on them. I have applied for jobs but I dont have a good feeling about any of them, who wants to hire someone that hasn't worked in 5 years. All of the sudden all of our side businesses have become our only source of income and we need these side businesses to blow up and grow, grow, grow. I make money with them now just not enough to supplement our majority income. I always get anxious at this time of the night. I do have some meds to help me go to sleep but not many, and we don't have insurance anymore for refills. I just hate this feeling, I feel helpless and like I'm drowning. Drowning in paper, those papers are bills and they just keep coming. I love my husband more than anything. He is so stressed right now and I hate seeing him like this. I know he feels helpless too. I think thats part of why I have been working so hard because I don't want him to feel helpless. I would love to be able to bring in majority income and give him a little break. He has worked so hard for the past 5 years. The whole reason I wanted to have my own businesses was to help bring in enough income so that Mike could get a different job and not have to worry about making as much money. I just haven't gotten to that point yet and them BAM all of the sudden I need to be at that point. I don't want to be this stressed. I would love to just relax for a little while and go to the park with my husband and the kids and swing on the swing set, just spending time together as a family. But every minute that I'm not working I feel like I'm waisting time and Mike feels the same way. Sometimes it feels like our house just sits still with us stuck inside, while the whole world spins around outside
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
So I got an email about eBay raising their fees AGAIN!! It's starting to not even be worth my time to sell on there because they keep raising fees and cutting into my profit. So I decided to search for another auction site to use. I did a google search and came up with several different auction sites. After an extensive comparison between several different sites I quickly figured out that eBids is the absolute best alternative to eBay!! I've been transferring my items to eBids all day long! It's alot simpler than eBay. Ofcourse it's not as widely known so it looks a little low budget but there are over 1 million auctions. That tells me that there are enough people that know about it that I can make some money!! I urge everyone who uses eBay to switch to eBids!!! Save your money!!
Thursday, February 4, 2010
What Happend to Marriage Values
nuI don't
The ones that had kids, I can understand how kids can put a big strain on a relationship. They are supposed to make you closer as a family but all too often the couple puts all their focus on the kids and not the marraige. You can't have a happy family if you don't have a happy marriage. Marraige is the head of the household and it must be catered to. Thats really easy to forget after having kids. So I can understand how those divorced couples that have kids, could have possiby gotten to the point of divorce.
But these couples who got married in their early 20's and stayed together for a year or two, had no kids and then divorce.? Really, what is the point in that?
Why in the crap would you spend all that money on a gorgeous wedding, if you aren't going to be committed to the marriage?
I don't believe in divorce. That might be stupid of me to say considering my husband was married before me. And guess what? He was in his early 20's when they got married, and he was in his early 20's when they got divorced. He will be the first to tell you that it was a really dumb mistake and they never should have gotten married. Even after talking to him I still don't get why he got married the first time.
*Disclaimer* Before you go getting all crazy on me for saying I don't belive in divorce let me clarify. If you are in an abusive marriage, be it physical, mental or emotional, I do belive you should get a divorce. Cheating is also grounds for divorce in my eyes, esspecially repeat offenders, some just won't ever change. If you are married to a drug addict and have tried to see it through and its just not happening, I believe that is also grounds for divorce. Please understand that I believe there are exceptions, even The Bible has rules and exceptions for divorce. I also know that you can not change someone but you do have control over yourself. So if you have truly given it your all (and it will usually take more than a year or two to know if you have given it your all) then you may be an exception. You can't change people and you can't help someone that won't help themselves. So anyway I understand there is gray area around divorce. So please don't have a freak out.**
When are these kids going to realize that it takes maturity to be married. Marriage isn't a game. Its not like playing house. You don't just decide to stop.
Howcome I knew that when I was 19 and got pregnant but apparently all these others don't. I didn't want to get married just because I was pregnant. I was not going to have a shotgun wedding. And Mike, well he had already been married so he wasn't about to jump into it agian unless he knew it was forever. My family was agianst it, I heard it from my Grandma every time I saw her. They all made it very clear that they did not approve of us having a baby and not being married, esspicially when the second baby came along. But guess what, none of them could do anything about it. None of them MADE us get married, they couldn't. You know why? Becuase they aren't me! I am me and I made my own decision not to get married, well I guess Mike helped in that too it wasn't just my decision. But seriously, I'm probably hitting a serious nerve with some people but why do you have to have a shotgun wedding at 18, 19, 20ish years old. How can anyone really say that their parents made them do it at that age?
I think there should be restrictions or requirements to be met before you are allowed to get married. Maybe a phsycological evaluation should be done before you can buy a wedding dress or rent a tux. LOL I don't know but something has got to be done about all these stupid people marrying and divorcing all the time.
So exactly why do people give up so easily? I knew our generation was a lazy one but I don't guess I realized how easy it is for people to run at the first sign of trouble. Its like the first good fight they have after the wedding and its done.
Grow up people. Or better yet, Grow Some Balls!
You entered into a leagally binding contract so figure out how to make it work!
I'm defiantely no expert in the area of relationships or marriage but I have been with my husband for 7 years and we have dealt with alot of different issues. People trying to come between us, rumors about cheating, long periods of seperation (due to his job, not acutally seperating), kids before marriage, co-habbitating before marriage, tons of fights. If I had a penny for every fight we got in, big or small, I would be an extremely rich woman. There are probably a ton more issues we dealt with those are just the ones that come to mind right now. But we worked through it.
Why? Not only becuase we love each other but because we have a family and we know that everything happens for a reason. God put us together for us to make two babies so obviously he wanted us to be together. It was just up to us to stay together.
It just makes me so sad to hear about people I went to high school with who are now getting divorced, already divorced, already divorced and remarried, or divorced and getting divorced agian. I'm just really thankful that God put me with a man who has finally realized it takes alot of work to be in a marriage, and that the work never ends. It is always a challenge to stay married. Are you up to the challenge? Seriously?
The ones that had kids, I can understand how kids can put a big strain on a relationship. They are supposed to make you closer as a family but all too often the couple puts all their focus on the kids and not the marraige. You can't have a happy family if you don't have a happy marriage. Marraige is the head of the household and it must be catered to. Thats really easy to forget after having kids. So I can understand how those divorced couples that have kids, could have possiby gotten to the point of divorce.
But these couples who got married in their early 20's and stayed together for a year or two, had no kids and then divorce.? Really, what is the point in that?
Why in the crap would you spend all that money on a gorgeous wedding, if you aren't going to be committed to the marriage?
I don't believe in divorce. That might be stupid of me to say considering my husband was married before me. And guess what? He was in his early 20's when they got married, and he was in his early 20's when they got divorced. He will be the first to tell you that it was a really dumb mistake and they never should have gotten married. Even after talking to him I still don't get why he got married the first time.
*Disclaimer* Before you go getting all crazy on me for saying I don't belive in divorce let me clarify. If you are in an abusive marriage, be it physical, mental or emotional, I do belive you should get a divorce. Cheating is also grounds for divorce in my eyes, esspecially repeat offenders, some just won't ever change. If you are married to a drug addict and have tried to see it through and its just not happening, I believe that is also grounds for divorce. Please understand that I believe there are exceptions, even The Bible has rules and exceptions for divorce. I also know that you can not change someone but you do have control over yourself. So if you have truly given it your all (and it will usually take more than a year or two to know if you have given it your all) then you may be an exception. You can't change people and you can't help someone that won't help themselves. So anyway I understand there is gray area around divorce. So please don't have a freak out.**
When are these kids going to realize that it takes maturity to be married. Marriage isn't a game. Its not like playing house. You don't just decide to stop.
Howcome I knew that when I was 19 and got pregnant but apparently all these others don't. I didn't want to get married just because I was pregnant. I was not going to have a shotgun wedding. And Mike, well he had already been married so he wasn't about to jump into it agian unless he knew it was forever. My family was agianst it, I heard it from my Grandma every time I saw her. They all made it very clear that they did not approve of us having a baby and not being married, esspicially when the second baby came along. But guess what, none of them could do anything about it. None of them MADE us get married, they couldn't. You know why? Becuase they aren't me! I am me and I made my own decision not to get married, well I guess Mike helped in that too it wasn't just my decision. But seriously, I'm probably hitting a serious nerve with some people but why do you have to have a shotgun wedding at 18, 19, 20ish years old. How can anyone really say that their parents made them do it at that age?
I think there should be restrictions or requirements to be met before you are allowed to get married. Maybe a phsycological evaluation should be done before you can buy a wedding dress or rent a tux. LOL I don't know but something has got to be done about all these stupid people marrying and divorcing all the time.
So exactly why do people give up so easily? I knew our generation was a lazy one but I don't guess I realized how easy it is for people to run at the first sign of trouble. Its like the first good fight they have after the wedding and its done.
Grow up people. Or better yet, Grow Some Balls!
You entered into a leagally binding contract so figure out how to make it work!
I'm defiantely no expert in the area of relationships or marriage but I have been with my husband for 7 years and we have dealt with alot of different issues. People trying to come between us, rumors about cheating, long periods of seperation (due to his job, not acutally seperating), kids before marriage, co-habbitating before marriage, tons of fights. If I had a penny for every fight we got in, big or small, I would be an extremely rich woman. There are probably a ton more issues we dealt with those are just the ones that come to mind right now. But we worked through it.
Why? Not only becuase we love each other but because we have a family and we know that everything happens for a reason. God put us together for us to make two babies so obviously he wanted us to be together. It was just up to us to stay together.
It just makes me so sad to hear about people I went to high school with who are now getting divorced, already divorced, already divorced and remarried, or divorced and getting divorced agian. I'm just really thankful that God put me with a man who has finally realized it takes alot of work to be in a marriage, and that the work never ends. It is always a challenge to stay married. Are you up to the challenge? Seriously?
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